Cāṇakya Paṇḍita has advised,
- lālane bahavo doṣās
- tāḍane bahavo guṇāḥ
- tasmāt putraṁ ca śiṣyam ca
- tāḍayen na tu lālayet
This is required. And Tulasī dāsa, he has also said . . . Tulasī dāsa is big poet in Hindi language. He has written the Rāma-carita-manas. His opinion . . . Not only his opinion; that is the Vedic opinion, that . . . He says, dhol gamar strī śūdra . . . paśu śūdra nārī, ei ei sab śāsana ke adhikārī(?). So this statement will not be very palatable to the Western girls. They want independence. In Chicago, when I was there, they talked about independence of the woman. They asked me question. So I replied, "No, womans cannot be given independence." So there was a great agitation against me. In many papers I was very much criticized. But actually it is the fact, because they are innocent, not so intelligent and . . . These are all practical. We may avoid discussing, but Bhāgavata is very open for discussing all subject matter. That is fact. We should not hide anything artificially. We must discuss the fact. Not only here, the mention it is, the Manu-saṁhitā. Manu-saṁhitā recommends, "A woman should not be given independence." For their interest they must be protected by father, husband and sons, because if they are polluted, they become very dangerous.
Cāṇakya Paṇḍita said that duṣṭā bhāryā.
- duṣṭā bhāryā śaṭhaṁ mitraṁ bhṛtyaś cottara-dāyakaḥ
- sa-sarpe ca gṛhe vāso mṛtyur eva na saṁśayaḥ
"If the wife is not chaste and friend is cheater, or śaṭham . . ." Śaṭham means duplicity, not very sincere friend. Outwardly he's showing he's very good friend, but inwardly he has got some intention. Such friend, duplicity, and unchaste wife, duṣṭā bhāryā śaṭhaṁ mitraṁ; and bhṛtyaś cottara-dāyakaḥ, and servant giving reply; and sa-sarpe ca grhe vāsaḥ, and in your room if there is a snake . . . Of course, in this big, big concrete building there is no question of snake, but in cottages, huts, made with mud, earth, there are sometimes snakes. So Cāṇakya Paṇḍita said that "If you live with a duṣṭā bhāryā and a duplicity friend and an answer-giving servant and a snake, then you are sure to die sometime. You'll be cheated."
So these things are there. The purpose is that our mind is like that, puṁścalī, unchaste wife. Not that everyone is unchaste. We have got many example, the character of woman. It is not that. It is not generalization. But there is chance. If they are not controlled, not properly educated, there is chance of becoming puṁścalī, and there have been many instances that woman, for being attracted by paramour, has killed even one's own son. There have been cases. So Bhīṣmadeva also advised that the shyness of woman, lajjā, is the control. If you break that shy, what is called, shyness, then there will be disaster. That is the control valve naturally given. And woman's shyness is one beauty, beauty. We have got practical experience. And command also. We have practical experience in our life. You have seen that my friend came, Dinanath Mishra. They were our neighbor. So one day we were sitting on the corridor of the house. One sweeper woman, she wanted to come within, but very shyful, with a covering of the head, although with broomstick and bucket, she was waiting because we were sitting both side. So she was feeling little shy not to enter the house. So we decided to move so that she may come. This example is given. She is a sweeper, not very respectable, maidservant or sweeper, but on account of her shyness we had to welcome, "Yes, we are moving. You come in." Just see. This is psychology. Therefore Bhīṣmadeva, at his dying stage, he advised that woman's shyness is the valve to control. If that shyness is broken, then it will create disaster. Puṁścalī. This is the psychology. So things are changing nowadays everywhere, not only in India, in other countries also. But this is the psychology. So all these examples are given. Why? Just to control the mind. In Hindi there is a proverb that "Money and wife, you should always keep in control." There are so many examples.