Prabhupāda: So I understand that she, she felt some inconvenience, that girl, in your company.
Govinda dāsī: (whispers) Harṣarāṇī! You're making . . .
Prabhupāda: So she was . . .
Tamāla Kṛṣṇa: I told her, I said if she wished to come with us,
(break) . . . that only married women could come with us. I told her that. Because it was not good for men, unmarried men, brahmacārī and brahmacārīṇi, to constantly be mixing, and so I felt that it would be better for married people than brahmacārīs. And she . . .
. . . did she wish to come?
Prabhupāda: She likes this . . .
But also marriage problem, one must have a choice. So if we force something, that is not (chuckling) good. At least, in your country it is not . . . of course, in your country and our country, all the boys and girls are, I mean to say, not major, whatever the parents force, that is another thing. When the boys and girls are grown up, it is not possible.
Just like in India, there was svayaṁvara. Svayaṁvara means the girl will select her own bridegroom. That was allowed to princess. Princess, highly qualified princess. So the father would make a challenge that, "This is the condition. One who can fulfill this condition, I'll offer my daughter to him." So this was generally amongst the princes. So there was great fight. (laughs)
Just like Arjuna. Arjuna married Draupadī. You know the condition? Her father made condition: there was a fish on the ceiling and one wheel was circling. So one has to pierce the eyes of the fish through the hole of the circle. And he cannot see directly. He has to see down. There is a reflection in water pot. In this way, he had to pierce. (laughs) "In this way, he has to fix, and in one stroke the eye will be pierced. One who is successful, my daughter is for him." So nobody could, except only Arjuna. He was such expert bowman that he . . .
Similarly, Lord Rāmacandra also made. In the palace there was a big bow. It was all hardened, made of iron. So long standing it was there. So one day, Sītā was sweeping the floor, and with her left hand she pushed the bow. It was very heavy. Nobody could . . . it was very weighty, heavy. And with her left hand she pushed it by a stick.
So her father said: "Oh, this is wonderful girl. She can lift this. Nobody can lift it, and with her left hand she pushed it? Oh, then my son-in-law will be he who can break this." (laughter) So he made a challenge that, "Anyone, any prince, who will come and break this bow, he'll be my son-in-law." So it was only possible by Rāmacandra, Lord Rāmacandra.
So these challenge were made amongst the kṣatriyas. Otherwise, generally, the parents would select. We are married. Whatever our parents selected, we accepted. I did not like my wife, (laughs) but gradually, I was accustomed. I was obliged to like. That's all. (laughs) That is the Indian system. You like or not like, you have to accept it. That's all. The psychology is that the girls, generally, before attaining puberty if she loves one boy, she cannot forget him. That is her psychology. And a boy also, when he is grown up, the first girl he makes choice, he also cannot forget. Therefore, by some way or other they are mixed up.
So in your country the situation is different. You see? Because the boys and girls are freely mixing, and from school, college, they are freely mixing, free sex without any restriction. So we cannot enforce, at least, at the present moment. If some boy and some girl agree, then I bless him. That's all.
Now another thing, that girls should not be taken as inferior. You see? Sometimes . . . of course, sometimes scripture we say that, "Woman is the cause of bondage." So that should not be, I mean to say, aggravated. (laughs) That should not be aggravated, that "Woman is inferior," or something like that. So the girls who come, you should treat them nicely, at least. I heard that Gargamuni, after his wife left him, he became a woman-hater like that. (chuckles) That is not good. You see? Yes.
After all, anyone who is coming to Kṛṣṇa consciousness, man or woman, boys or girls, they are welcome. They are very fortunate. You see. And the idea of addressing "prabhu" means "you are my master." That is the . . . Prabhu means master. And "Prabhupāda" means many masters who bows down at his lotus feet. That is Prabhupāda. So each, everyone shall treat others as "my master." This is the Vaiṣṇava system.