More than one wife (Letters)

Expressions researched:
"More than one wife"

1968 Correspondence

As I was at that time very young man, and an educated college student, I wanted to marry again, in spite of my wife being present. Because amongst the Hindus one can accept more than one wife (of course the law is now changed).

Letter to Gargamuni -- Allston, Mass 5 May, 1968:

I am in due receipt of your very nice letter dated 4/27/68, and the sentiments expressed in that letter by you gives me more pleasure that you are appreciating the importance of our movement. I am sure that you must appreciate like that because I am always of opinion that both you and your elder brother are the result of a good mother. So I very much appreciate both yours and your brother's activities and it appears that both of you were in your previous birth advanced in this line of Krishna Consciousness, and here is another chance to complete it. So by the Grace of Krishna you have got good intelligence, you are born of a great nation, and good family; just utilize the opportunity to finish the business of Krishna Consciousness, without waiting for further incarnation. Srimad-Bhagavatam says that we should try for the highest achievement, and complete it before the next death comes. I think that your separation from Karunamayi is Krishna's desire. So don't be sorry for it. In this connection I may tell you my personal life experience. When I was married at the age of 21 with a wife who was only 11 years old, practically I did not like my wife. And as I was at that time very young man, and an educated college student, I wanted to marry again, in spite of my wife being present. Because amongst the Hindus one can accept more than one wife (of course the law is now changed). So, whenever everything was all ready for my marriage with another girl, my great father who was a great devotee of the Lord, called me and instructed me in the following words:

"My dear boy, I understand that you are trying to get yourself married again, but I would advise you not to do this. It is Krishna's Grace that your present wife is not just according to your liking. This will help you not to become attached with wife and home, and this will help you in the matter of your future advancement of Krishna Consciousness."

Now, I accepted my father's advice, and by his blessings, only, I was never attached to my wife or home which resulted in my complete liberation from worldly attachment and devote myself fully in Krishna Consciousness. Therefore I think your separation from Karunamayi is also the same opportunity for your being cent per cent engaged in Krishna Consciousness.

1973 Correspondence

If anyone is able to keep more than one wife and give them all comforts of life, there is no objection for having more than one wife.

Letter to Karandhara -- Bombay 9 January, 1973:

Please accept my blessings. Your letter dated December 28, 1972, is in hand and I have noted the contents carefully. According to our Vedic process, polygamy is allowed. For example, Krsna married 16,000 wives, Arjuna married 3 or 4 wives, Krsna's father Vasudeva, married 16 or 18 wives, like that. So according to the Vedic system polygamy is not prohibited. But it is not a farce also. Every wife must be provided for sufficiently. Krsna married 16,000 wives, but each wife was provided a palace and He was personally present at each palace. It does not meant to marry many wives and maintain none of them. If anyone is able to keep more than one wife and give them all comforts of life, there is no objection for having more than one wife. But if he creates trouble by marrying, he should not marry even one wife, this is my judgment. Now you can do the needful, taking into consideration the circumstances of the laws of your country, the customs of your people, the reputation of our society, the example which will be set for future devotees to follow, like that. For karmis, the Vedic system of marriage was given by Krsna so they may come gradually to the point of becoming devotees. But for devotees, it is advised to minimize sex life to the point of nil. So if that cannot be done, then there is regulation of sex life by marriage. Actually the system of polygamy is natural because the human entity is meant for transcending the animal forms of life and going back to home, back to Godhead. Therefore there should remain a class of men who do not marry in the society. But that will create an unfavorable situation of excessive population of unmarried women. Therefore it is advised that all women get themselves married, and if there is any man who is better able to maintain wife and family, he is advised to marry as many women as he can maintain and thereby free other men in the society to remain brahmacari. So I can understand that many men of our society have got themselves married only for some disastrous result. That means that not all of our men are meant for married life, but because there are so many women we may not leave them unprotected without husband, that will also not serve us well. Therefore it will be the best idea if those who are well-qualified as husbands to keep more than one wife very much satisfied in every respect, if such men can marry more than once. That will free the others to remain brahmacari. But you must consider very carefully the possibility of becoming scandalized in the public for breaking their laws in this way. And in future also the devotees who are neophyte may not understand our policy in this connection, and we gradually could wind up attracting only a class of men who are very eager for unlimited sex life only. These things must be avoided at all cost.

Enclosed please find also the letter-proposal from Syamasundara. as suggested by me to relieve me from these decisions regarding husband and wife. Kindly distribute this proposal to all the 12 GBC men in the world. They may write to me their views on the point and give their yes or no answer to the proposal.

Although it is a Vedic institution still there are so many legal implications. Neither are many of our men fixed up enough to tend for more than one wife. Polygamy will simply increase the sex life and our philosophy is to gradually decrease the sex life till eventually there is no sex life.

Letter to Rupanuga -- Sydney 14 February, 1973:

Please accept my blessings. I am in receipt of your letter dated 31/1/73. After conferring with my various GBC representatives I have concluded that polygamy must be strictly prohibited in our society. Although it is a Vedic institution still there are so many legal implications. Neither are many of our men fixed up enough to tend for more than one wife. Polygamy will simply increase the sex life and our philosophy is to gradually decrease the sex life till eventually there is no sex life. The policy should be that all the women are given the utmost protection. Women are looking for husbands because they feel unprotected so it is up to the senior members to give all protection to the women.

We do not encourage more than one wife, but provided the man is highly responsible and conscientious and the woman agrees then we have no objection.

Letter to Locanananda -- December 6, 1973:

Please accept my blessings. I am in receipt of your letter dated December 2, 1973. From the Vedic point of view a man can have more than one wife provided he can maintain each of them very nicely. The practical example is our Lord Krsna. He had 16,108 wives but for each wife he maintained a palace with servants and everything. We do not encourage more than one wife, but provided the man is highly responsible and conscientious and the woman agrees then we have no objection.

The thing is how you will maintain two wives? You cannot give up one and take another. We cannot be responsible. You will have to manage everything and if there is any legal implication then we cannot be responsible. The Temple cannot pay for you to have two wives so it must be arranged for outside.

1974 Correspondence

No, devotees are not allowed more than one wife. Devotees should have no wife if possible, but those who cannot maintain celibacy, they can marry one wife.

Letter to Sukadeva -- Bombay 24 November, 1974:

Regarding free will and pre-destination, yes, materially everything is decided. Spiritually you can make advancement despite all material destiny. Materially you cannot change things as they are but spiritually it is possible. No, devotees are not allowed more than one wife. Devotees should have no wife if possible, but those who cannot maintain celibacy, they can marry one wife. At the present moment people are so unfortunate they cannot maintain even one wife. First of all at the present moment they are not married and remain mostly unmarried. So for such persons even one wife is a great burden. Under the circumstances how one can think of more than one wife? This is stupidity.

1975 Correspondence

Regarding the question of second marriage, it cannot be done.

Letter to Bhagavan -- Vrindaban 7 September, 1975:

Regarding the question of second marriage, it cannot be done. Neither the law will allow it and neither we can encourage it. If they want to marry more than one wife, they must live outside our temples in their own arrangements. We have no objection if he does it, but it must be done outside the temple. It cannot be done inside the temple jurisdiction. Outside he can work, earn money, and if he wants he can maintain 16,000 wives. But he must go outside the Society. Within the Society only one marriage can be allowed.

I thought these boys and girls will be married and be happy. But, I see that they are not satisfied. In the Western countries they are trained up in a different way. Jumping from one to another. Another wife, another husband. This is the disease all over the world. Simply by agreement, then cancelled, then another agreement.

Everyone wants more than one wife. That is human nature. This means their mind is not being diverted to Krishna. Because they are not madan mohan, they are madan dahan, they are in the Cupid's fire. You want them to have more wives under GBC supervision. You will supply the maintenance? What is this nonsense? They must go outside the Society to do it. And, the sort of marriage where they are not satisfied cannot be allowed. Nor can women with child strictly she cannot marry again.