Śīlavatī: Prabhupāda, you said that as long as one is engaging in sex life one cannot become a yogi.
Śīlavatī: Yet the other day you were extolling the virtues of household life and you said, and you named some of the great ācāryas that were householders and you said...
Prabhupāda: Yes, that is bhakti-yoga. In this ordinary yoga system as it will be explained in this chapter, one has to strictly follow the life of celibacy. But in the bhakti-yoga system the whole idea is that you have to fix up your mind in Kṛṣṇa. So whatever position… Householder life does not mean to indulge in sex enjoyment. A householder may have wife, may have sex life, but that is for having children only, that's all. A householder does not mean he gets license to legalize prostitution. That is not householder. Householder can simply have sex life to beget nice child, that's all, no more. That is householder life; completely controlled. Householder does not mean whenever he has got this machine and he can use it. No. Householder, husband and wife, both Kṛṣṇa conscious, engaged in Kṛṣṇa conscious business, but when they require a child, Kṛṣṇa conscious, that's all. That is also voluntary contraceptive method. One or two or three children, that's all, no more. So householder life does not mean sex life without any restriction. But for spiritual life… One who wants to advance in spiritual life, either you accept this bhakti-yoga system or this aṣṭāṅga-yoga system or jñāna-yoga system, sex indulgence unrestricted is never there. Sex indulgence means you have to come back again. If you try to enjoy the senses, that is materialistic way of life.
Materialistic way of life is that I have got nice senses, let me enjoy the senses to the fullest extent. That is materialistic way of life. Just like cats, dogs, and hogs. The hogs, whenever they are sexually inclined, they don't care for whether it is his mother or sister or this or that. That is stated in the Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam: nāyaṁ deho deha-bhājāṁ nṛloke kaṣṭān kāmān arhate viḍ-bhujāṁ ye (SB 5.5.1). Viḍ-bhujām. Viḍ-bhujām means, viṭ means stool, and bhujām means eater. So the stool-eater's sense gratification is not meant for this human form of life. Stool-eater means these hogs. The hog’s sense gratification is not meant for this human form of life. Restriction. Therefore in the human form of life there is marriage system. Why? What is the marriage and prostitution? Marriage system means restricting sex life. Marriage system does not mean that you get a wife, ah - without any payment you go on unrestricted sex life. No, that is not marriage. Marriage means to restrict your sex life. He'll hunt for sex life here and there? No, you cannot do that. Here is your wife, and that is only for child. It is restriction.
There are four things: loke vyavāyāmiṣa-madya-sevā nityā hi jantor na hi tatra codanā (SB 11.5.11) Vyavāya - sex life, and meat-eating, āmiṣa. Āmiṣa means eating meat, fish, eggs. So, vyavāya means sex. Sex and meat-eating, non-vegetarian diet. Āmiṣa… Mada-sevā, intoxication. Nityāsu jantuḥ. Every conditioned soul has natural inclination. Pravṛtti. But one has to control that. That is human life. If you put yourself in the waves of natural inclination, that is not human life. You have to restrict. The whole human life is meant for learning restriction. That is human life. That is perfect Vedic civilization. Tapo divyaṁ yena śuddhyet sattvam (SB 5.5.1). One has to purify his existence. What is that existence? I am spirit, ever-existing, eternal. Now I have contaminated this matter, therefore I am suffering. So I have to purify. Just like you have to get free from the diseased condition. When you get fever you take treatment. Not unrestricted enjoyment. The doctor says, "Don't do this, don't do this, don't do this." Similarly this human form of life is to get out of this diseased condition of life - having a material body. So if we don't restrict then where is the treatment? Where is the cure? The whole system is restriction. Tapo divyam (SB 5.5.1). Just to concentrate one's activities in austerities, penances, for transcendental realization. That is human form of life.
But there are different orders of social society: brahmacārī, gṛhastha, vānaprastha, sannyāsa. The whole process is to restrict. But gṛhastha, householder means giving a little license who cannot completely restrict sex life. That's all. Gṛhastha does not mean unrestricted sex life. If you have known this married life like that, that's a wrong conception. You have to control if you want to get out of this diseased condition of life. You cannot get out of disease and unrestrictedly go on enjoying your senses. No. That is not possible. Yad indriya-prītaya āpṛṇoti na sādhu manye yata ātmano 'yam asann api kleśada āsa dehaḥ (SB 5.5.4). Those who are indulging unrestrictedly in sense enjoyment civilization… That is not good. Because that will lead him to accept next again this material body. Maybe human body, or animal body, or any body. But he has to accept this body. And as soon as you accept this body then you'll have to undergo the threefold miseries of the body. Birth, death, old age, diseases. These are the symptoms of threefold miseries.
So people… One has to understand scientifically these things but they are neglecting. So therefore continuing suffering. They do not care for suffering also. Just like the animals, they are suffering, but they do not care for it. They forget. So practically this sense gratification civilization means animal civilization. A little polished, that's all.